Last night I went to my singly lamp-lit bedroom; my room lit by my favorite lamp I've had since college. I went to put down my glass of water when the sight of my nightstand made my stomach drop and I asked myself this question,
Will my life ever be this simple again?
Not that things are completely simple. The past 3 1/2 years spent in Chicago have been anything but, however I've learned to enjoy the simplicities of day-to-day life. A simple bedtime routine of cuddling up with a good novel. Occasionally listening to my iPod as I write in my journal. Snuggling up while watching a TV show or a movie. No strings and no attachments apply.
The impending transition of my life hit me all at once. It scared me. I knew in that instant that nothing has ever stayed the same and nothing will ever be the same. What will happen when two becomes three? I think about all of the changes and challenges that have been presented over the past few years and I realized that they've made me who I am...they've made me more into the person I am meant to be. I know that this change will be the same. It will make me become more of who I am.
I struggle everyday to live life in the moment. Not living in the past and not worrying about the future. I try to truly savor every moment for what it is. And so I lay in bed last night realizing this. This is where I'm meant to be, lying in bed curled up with a great book. When the next transition arrives there will be a new normal that is more beautiful and complete. It will be just where I'm meant to be.