Hi! It's me. I was wondering if we could have a little chat sometime? No? You don't do that sort of thing? Well, I was wondering if you could just hear me out. This pregnancy insomnia is about to do me in. Waking up at 3 AM five days out of the week is starting to get a little tough on me. No matter what I try, it's really hard for me to go back to sleep during the wee hours of these restless mornings. And I'm tired.
I've heard it said that pregnancy insomnia, and waking up five times a night to use the restroom prepares you for the wakefulness you experience with a newborn. But the thing is, I'm prepared. I get it. I've been there. I was just there. I don't need practice. I really, really don't.
What I would like to happen is to catch up on my sleep before Baby No. 2 gets here. Everyone else in my house is getting full nights of sleep, how about me too?
So, I propose that we strike some sort of deal. You give me full nights of sleep in exchange for--I'll recycle. I'll take longer walks outside. Maybe enjoy your beauty a little more. I won't complain about long and treacherous Midwestern winters. I'll shovel snow with glee. I'll stop scaring women out of pregnancy with my horrific tales of morning sickness and breast feeding. I'll go green. I'll eat organic.
Will any of these things work? Just let me know. You know where to reach me. You somehow find me every morning.
Thank you for your consideration, Morgandi.
P.S. I've been thinking about the "not complaining about snow" thing, and I don't know if I can do that one. You make some really long winters around here. I'm just saying.