I feel like I need to clarify a little fact after my last post. I do not pee my pants on a regular basis. In fact, I haven't peed my pants in years. Decades, even. Well, except for when I was 22 and had a dream that I was swimming in water. Or the time a few years ago when I laughed so hard with Jason. Or the time a few months ago when I decided I would add jumping rope to my workout routine. I haven't jumped rope since.
Okay, so maybe it happens. To everyone. You know it's happened to you. Especially if you've had a baby. It's amazing what that will do to a girl.
But I need to let you know that it doesn't happen when I run. It has never happened when I run. It was just so cold and so wet and I held it for a really long time during my two-and-a-half-hour run. It's like sticking your finger in water or hearing water run when you really have to go. Sometimes you just can't help yourself when the odds are stacked up against you.
So don't be scared if your running next to me on the treadmill. I will control myself. I promise.
But moving on to another girl who pees her pants on a regular basis.
I introduce to you, Stella. Future Fashion Plate of America.
Please look at her right arm. That would be a leg warmer that she demanded to wear on her arm. She cried and cried and waved the leg warmer in my face until I decrypted her baby talk and understood her need to express herself through fashion.
A girl after my own heart.
And yes, sometimes I let her put all the tupperware in the trash can when I'm busy.
That's just how I roll.